First piece to be published online

I'm so incredibly excited about my piece being published!! I have been writing here and there, when I find time to sit and focus on typing up thoughts and lessons learned.  I've tried so many times before and I never had anyone say "I really liked what I read, I'm going to publish it".  Till now, and might I say that it's all in God's time.  The surprise came to me when I most needed it.  I was having a somewhat hard day, and then it came! that beautiful email, letting me know my piece will be published.  I'm very happy and I can't wait to see it actually on the website I turned it in to.  I'm happy as can be!!

Frustration

there are times when I just need to let it out.. a Vent session to be more specific.  I just find life so difficult sometimes.  I have stayed home with my children for the past 17 years, because to me personally it has been the most important thing in my life.  My decision to be a stay at home mom came as easy as breathing in and out.  I never gave it much thought, I knew I wanted to be the only one raising my children.  I knew exactly what I didn't want.  I didn't want kids with other people's values and morals.  If I had children it would be to raise them myself.  Okay and now flash forward to the here and now.  My children are grown, they are extraordinary human beings.  I love them dearly, they love me back.  They have the amazing quality of being good to myself and their father, they do as they are told, they are Free to be themselves.  Now the problem! my eldest daughter is about to graduate high school, and looking into Universities... and as it most commonly is with single income families, we make, well my husband does, but bless his precious heart ~ he has always been the sweetest person ever, he has never made me feel like it's his money.  He has always called it "our" money.  So anyways, he makes a good amount of money, yet we are strapped financially just because of the high cost of living.  So given that information... my problem, our problem is that education is crazy expensive and we can't afford to pay for our children s higher learning.   It's so darn frustrating, to have given so much of myself to my children, have outstanding students.. they are all ... Yes.. all three of my children are straight A students.  And we don't have the money to send them to college.  Oh boy!! I guess you can't have it all in life.  WEll, my kids will have to take out loans and finance their education, because even with all this grief.. I wouldn't trade my being home with them for anything in the world.  I'm proud of my children and I feel responsible for the amazing persons they have become.  Raising them was easy because it was done with LOVE.

2011

In 2011 I intend to  attract more peace into my life.  Having come to such a beautiful stage in my life where I worry less and love more.  What a blessing to get to this place of peace.  Why did I end up here? I don't know, maybe I've come back to what I was meant to be all along.  A child of God, filled with his love and compassion.  I just intend to "BE", to stay still in the midst of whatever is going on in life.. just BE and let God be.  I trust completely in life and all it's goodness.  I'm not leaving this space of peace..

Christmas 2010

It is a day before Christmas eve.  Yes, we celebrate Christmas Eve, like all Hispanic families.  I don't exactly find Christmas as exciting as it was when I was a young little girl, or a teenager.  Now I find more of a nostalgic side to it.  I tend to start thinking of how Christmas was for me before, before I grew up and had kids of my own.  When I was a kid myself.  When my parents would do the best they could to make it a happy time for us Seven kids in the house.  In the midst of our poverty, it seems it never had anything to do with presents.. the only gift I remember clearly is some perfumed talcum powder my mom wrapped for me.  As simple as it was I know it came with all of my mothers love.  My mother's love is the best gift I ever received.. and a gift I treasure and still look back on.  I love Christmas because of the love that is felt.. among my family, among friends.  I will try to make it yet another great Christmas for my children.. and thank God for all the blessings this year has brought to our family.

This is my Family

I enjoy the blessing of my children.   

I am not afraid to let it be known how very much I love my children.

I will always let everyone know my children come first.

My husband is my biggest treasure.... my companion... my best friend.

Bullying

I know bullying has been around forever, but recently there have been horrific outcomes due to bullying.  It saddens me deeply to know there are parents out there who have gone through the devastating nightmare of losing a child.  I can't begin to know or feel what those parents have lived through.  There is no greater love than that for a child, for a child you have brought into this world.  And I think the responsible ones are the parents of those bullies.  I have seen parents with very young children, at parks, in public places.. oh goodness I can remember having my kids at a fast food playground, and seeing parents stand by while their children bullied other kids.  Why do parents find pride in such bad behavior?  why can't all parents be educated and civilized?  I know we aren't all good parents. I feel I am, and I know I am.  I have done what I can to teach my children good.  I always told my children to walk away from bullying, to never be part of some one picking on some one else.  Never to join in or even laugh at some one else s troubles.  We need to teach our children love and care for all that surrounds them, and most of all to value LIFE and the life of others.  What, I ask myself - has led to children being so cold and inhumane????.

I'm just Enjoying life as is

I have learned to find my own happiness....  and as it turns out to be it's actually the easiest thing to do!!  I'm surrounded by love and love comes out of me.  I give love and I receive love.  Money isn't everything, and it isn't what produces happiness.  Money is needed to keep living comfortably, yes we need to pay the bills and buy groceries.. but does it give me happiness to know I have money in the bank? no it doesn't.  What makes me happy???   


Hearing them say "I love you Mom" when they get off the car at school in the morning.
Looking at my kids  faces when I pick them up from school.
Sitting for dinner and seeing my children enjoying their meal.
Having prepared a meal for my family.
Being home and not at some office working.
Hugging my husband and feeling that warmth I only feel when I'm close to him.
Walking into the room after a night bathroom visit, and seeing my husband in bed.
Being in love with my husband.
Being Grateful to God for all he gives us.


Happiness is so easy to attain........  Don't complicate it...... let it flow in and out of your heart  :)